"Stay at home" mom

Today has been a difficult, long day. My husband has been at work all day and is currently still at work. He also is working all day tomorrow. I'm very grateful for a husband that works so diligently to provide for our family. However, days like today, with a teething, feverish, 14 month old...no contact with any adults & only conversations that contained minimal words with Caden...I'm wiped. I often think to myself, "how do stay at home moms do this all of the time?"

I'm not going to lie... This was never a dream or a plan. I know many women wouldn't trade being stay at home moms for anything. I also know there are mommas that have to work and so wish they were able to stay home with there babies. I'm sure everyone has a story.

So, here I am. It just so happens that two years ago I was let go of a job that I was ready to build my life on, give my life to, and raise a family while doing it. It's hard to imagine now, with Caden and another baby on the way, living that life...but it was my passion. I know we would have managed. I always thought it was cool when my director's kids were like the the MC kids and we raised in such a stellar atmosphere.

My own mom was a stay at home mom for much of my growing up years and I can't imagine not having her home when we all got home from school. She was the best. It seemed there was always something yummy coming out of the oven for an after school snack as soon as we walked through the door. With my dad being a bi-vocational pastor, honestly, my mom did a majority of the parenting. I know if it weren't for her dedication to us kids, I definitely wouldn't be who I am today.

I never imagined being a "stay at home" mom would be so difficult. I guess how would one know until you're living it?!?

But let me assure you, it is not a walk in the park. This is by far the hardest thing I've done in my life. And for all of the moms who embrace this calling every day, I say "kudos" to you.

It's hard to imagine that I'll always be a stay at home mom. I have dreams and vision beyond staying home and raising our children. In the mean time, I'm allowing the Lord to correct my mentalities of the "lowliness" of being a stay at home mom and wife and that somehow I'm not doing enough and should be doing more. I'm certain this is exactly where God wants me right now. I don't understand it all and feel like I probably never will. None the less, here's to humbling myself and continuing to serve in such a selfless, humbling manner.

So to all the moms out there...and moms-to-be... kudos to you in whatever role you find yourself... your strength and endurance amaze me!